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: The hypothetical wayward daughter
The other day, my sister-in-law asked me what I would think, feel and do if my hypothetical daughter (let's call her "Florette") went into porn.
Assuming she was of legal age, there wouldn't be anything I could do about it, I said. I would be concerned that she'd know what she was doing, that she ensured her personal and financial safety and that she wasn't going to do something she'd regret a few years down the line. However, as she was an adult, there wouldn't be anything I could do to stop her.
What this ultimately came down to was my sister-in-law asking me if Florette getting into porn would bother me. I said it would, but there are plenty of other things people can do which worry their parents. Now, a day or two before this discussion, I offhandedly said of people in porn, "Every one of them has a mother." If I'm concerned about what might happen to Florette in the porn industry, why not those people?
I know enough about the porn industry to realize that some of the people who go into it are damaged, and that some who are in it get damaged or more so. However, I don't know them personally and I'm not related to them. I'm responsible (even if not legally) for Florette's well-being, which applies whether she does porn or whether she, say, takes up technical diving or something else dangerous. What Jenna Jameson does for a living, and whatever damage she may do to herself as a result, isn't my concern. I do think that sex workers should have better legal protections, from forces both inside and outside the industry.
Sure, if Florette told me, or if I found out, she was doing porn, I'd spend a few sleepless nights over it. That's what fathers do if they give a damn about their kids. I'd also trust that I had taught her well enough that she would do porn safely, sanely and consensually.
Tags: advice to vijay, family, pornography
The other day, my sister-in-law asked me what I would think, feel and do if my hypothetical daughter (let's call her "Florette") went into porn.
Assuming she was of legal age, there wouldn't be anything I could do about it, I said. I would be concerned that she'd know what she was doing, that she ensured her personal and financial safety and that she wasn't going to do something she'd regret a few years down the line. However, as she was an adult, there wouldn't be anything I could do to stop her.
What this ultimately came down to was my sister-in-law asking me if Florette getting into porn would bother me. I said it would, but there are plenty of other things people can do which worry their parents. Now, a day or two before this discussion, I offhandedly said of people in porn, "Every one of them has a mother." If I'm concerned about what might happen to Florette in the porn industry, why not those people?
I know enough about the porn industry to realize that some of the people who go into it are damaged, and that some who are in it get damaged or more so. However, I don't know them personally and I'm not related to them. I'm responsible (even if not legally) for Florette's well-being, which applies whether she does porn or whether she, say, takes up technical diving or something else dangerous. What Jenna Jameson does for a living, and whatever damage she may do to herself as a result, isn't my concern. I do think that sex workers should have better legal protections, from forces both inside and outside the industry.
Sure, if Florette told me, or if I found out, she was doing porn, I'd spend a few sleepless nights over it. That's what fathers do if they give a damn about their kids. I'd also trust that I had taught her well enough that she would do porn safely, sanely and consensually.
Tags: advice to vijay, family, pornography